The First Semester

Well, it hardly seems possible but I'm within days of the end of the first semester here at training college. I had been warned that time flew here at CFOT but I don't know that I was fully prepared for that. I thought I'd jot down a few of the reasons why time has flown so fast and how they are affecting me.

The school aspect has been a combination of doors opening wide and severe frustration for me. It was anticipated that due to my lack of education before coming here that university level coursework would be a challenge for me, and while that is true I am happy to say that I am managing better than expected. In fact my two highlights in a week are Old Testament and Church History classes. I have really come to love the time spent in Church History and am going to miss it in the next semesters. Old Testament class has opened my eyes to some new ways of reading the Bible and learning what is has to teach us. As I have learned some of the context and culture of the times it has really helped my understanding.

Field has been a growing experience in every way. We are interacting with groups and people from all over the city and I feel privileged to participate in that program. Every time we go out as a group I learn some new aspect of the Army and how it works to provide assistance for those that require it. I am excited to be participating in a field placement next semester and look forward to the opportunity provided to me there.

They are about using your talents here that's for sure. I have done 5 dance performances, a duet twice, am up to sing a solo, play in the band and the list goes on. This is a great environment for that because no matter what your talent is - singing, speaking, administration - there is a place for you. What I've listed are just some of the many opportunities here, so I don't want people to think it's all about the music cause that just isn't the case.

These are just a few of the reasons why it seems like I just arrived. I still miss home an awful lot, well, more the people then Calgary itself, but am excited to be here and slaving away :). I'm sure the next few months to the summer will go even faster, but now to get through the rest of December.

Tribute

Here is what I read at my grandfather's funeral and I really can't think of another way to write it so I'm posting it on my blog as is.

I am the oldest of the 11 grandchildren and I have been living in Winnipeg since September when I joined the college for officers training just like my grandfather, and I just discovered what to me, is a very cool connection. Every group of people in this program is given a sessional name. My session is called the Ambassadors of Holiness and often just the Ambassadors, so when I looked at Grandpa’s college photo and discovered that his session was called the Ambassadors I was pretty thrilled. If I can express one personal wish it is that I can be an officer that my grandfather would have been proud of.

You’ve heard from his sons, and now it is my privilege to tell you about our grandfather. Well, finally after 6 boys Grandpa got his girls in his grandkids and he liked that. Shonda talks about how Grandpa made her so comfortable the first time he met her with his sense of humour and stories, and I know he always loved to cuddle on the couch with me and tell me stories for as long as I would stay there or until I fell asleep and sometimes even after I fell asleep. His stories whether true or not were always entertaining, and it seemed to bring equal amounts of happiness for him to talk to his granddaughters as it did for his granddaughters to listen.

Now, don’t think Grandpa only loved the girl’s because that just wasn’t true. Scott can tell you stories about going up the roof of the apartment building with him, and sending goodnight wishes and love from their house on signal hill down to Grandma and Grandpa’s. There were plenty of times where Grandpa leaned over to whisper a joke or express the wish that someone would stop talking, but I think Stephen really summed it up where he said “You could always see behind his eyes a wisecrack. He never didn't have something to say; now whether he said it or not was another matter entirely”.

Now always having something to say is a trait that has been passed down through his children and his grandchildren. This idea of whether or not he said what he was thinking is very unique and has not yet come through the gene pool.

I have so many memories of Grandpa that have been going through my mind this week and it’s hard to pick out the ones to share and to hide the ones that will get me into trouble. He always seemed to want to break the rules whether it was going after sweets or talking when he shouldn’t be. He is of course famous for falling asleep at the table and I remember many lunches in downtown Calgary and Grandpa snoozing away while Grandma and I chatted.

I could go into the stories and events involving my grandfather for a long, long time but really what I want to tell everyone is that he was great. It is a good thing, when, as a grandchild I can look back on so many times – his retirement, Easter in Abbotsford, many times in Calgary – and the list goes on – and they are all great memories. Ones that make me laugh, smile and always remember how loved I felt. I am so privileged to be up here speaking on behalf of the grandchildren about a grandparent who evokes grins and automatic story telling of all the crazy things that happened with him around. He used to lean over and whisper “I love you, you know, so Grandpa, you’ll be missed, and your legacy continues in us but most importantly I love you, you know.

Some Funny Moments

Well, I thought I'd write out some of the funny moments that have happened to me and around me and some even because of me since I've been here.

• On the day of my first time as the chapel leader I managed to catch the back of my pants on a chair and tear them. I then proceeded to tell everyone about it so they were aware of why I had my jacket tied around my waist.

• In pastoral care class when discussing about an internal process that shows outwardly I said "This rings a bell, I'm just not sure which one"

• I brought down the back door of the van onto someones head (accident I swear it)

• One of my session mates has an interesting time mixing up words of songs singing things like "High, high as the ocean" or "the world before me, the cross behind me". The last one came up when we were singing the chorus to Onward Christian Soldiers which contains the line "with the cross of Jesus going on before" and I leaned forward and said to her "note how the cross comes before you".

These aren't all of them but a few to start you off. I figure I'll continue this theme as the months go by cause we all know I'll have even more of these moments. I'll also say that any of these stories that involve other people are written with their permission.

Opportunities and Overwhelmed

This is just a quick update and hello to the world of blogging. I can tell you that as I write this I am taking a brief break from finishing up some of the hundred or so things I have to get done this week, and am feeling a little bit crazy. We've been having a week full of rehearsals with worship teams, creative movement, new songs etc...and that takes its toll as well as sermons to write, orders of service to prepare and upcoming assignments that are due. I can honestly say that even now I have never felt so fulfilled as I do right now. That thought makes me shake my head and wonder about my sanity but even in the moments where I could sit down and cry from my to do list I still feel a certain degree of peace that this is where God wants me to be.

I will be fortunate enough to be able to go to the Olympics in Vancouver come February and that is an extremely exciting prospect. I think it's going to be a wonderful time of learning and experiencing. Seeing the many ways the Salvation Army participates in large events will certainly be good for me.

Today was also the day to find out our Winter Assignments. This is an opportunity for us to participate in the many Christmas activities in and around the corps and other services of the Salvation Army around the country. I was thrilled to find out that I am heading to New Westminster, BC for 10 days and am looking forward to the many opportunities I will have there. I will also be praying for my session mates and the Prayer Warriors as they head into their various assignments.

So, I'm overwhelmed with opportunities here and most days...it's a good thing :).

Family Visit/Thanksgiving Weekend

Well, it was a great Thanksgiving weekend here as my family all showed up in Winnipeg to celebrate my grandparents 80th birthdays and 55th wedding anniversary. I was very pleased to see my two youngest cousins who I haven't seen since they were toddlers and aunts and uncles who I don't get to see very often. Oh and I got to see my dad too which was okay ;).

As we spent the weekend going from meal to meal I was given ample time to reflect on the many things I have to be thankful for. For family who is close and gets together at least every few years. For being able to go out for dinner and have my choice of food. For freedom of religion that we can all worship Christ together at church, and many other things.

I was of course thrilled to have my family from Calgary all come in....yes all 6 of them drove out, and this made my month. In the past 18 months or so I have spent a great deal of time with them and have really missed them these past two months. Getting to spend two whole days with them really cheered me up. It was very hard to say goodbye but I know no matter what happens, they'll always be there to puncture my ego and remind me of my roots :). Love you guys!!!

Welcome Weekend

Well, I'm now official. This past weekend was the official march in for the 2009 Ambassadors of Holiness session for the College For Officers Training. I was overwhelmed by the feelings that assailed me as I marched down the centre aisle and was met by the territorial commanders, and as I watched my session mates do the same thing.

The weekend began with a visit to each of the first years condos by Commissioners Francis, Majors Bond and Major Ivany. I was very pleased to see that they are willing to take the time and meet with each of us making it clear that their interest in us is vested and personal. Sunday morning was a chapel service for the cadets and their family/friends and the leadership of the Salvation Army that were in the city. There was an opportunity to hear testimonies from Joyce and Peter and I was given the opportunity to perform a creative movement piece with a second year cadet Elizabeth.

A little bit later in the day was the public service at Southlands where surrounded by members of the Salvation Army from all over we were welcomed into the session by the territorial commanders. The service was excellent with some more opportunities for participation including an interview of our flag bearer and a cello solo.

I was happy to have my Mom and Eric & Gilles there as well as a chance to get to see Fred and Wendy. These are all people who have influenced my Christian walk in many different ways and it meant a great deal to have them there for the two days.

Arrived

Well, it's yet another post for August, but if I'm going to write about being on my way to Winnipeg I have to write about arriving.

I made it into Winnipeg safe & sound on Friday. I have been spending the weekend shopping, setting up and generally moving in. I am also very fortunate to have a great deal of family in Winnipeg who are not at all mechanically inclined by still got the few pieces of furniture I had put together alright. Also, fortunately with my Dad & Glenda here for the weekend I was able to get out and do any and all shopping required and am now happy to say that I am well set up. I'm sure odds and ends will pop up along the way but for now...I have arrived.

Look for more posts as school gets going. I'm going to try to stick to my minimum of once a month but I am hoping for more as I start all this new stuff up.

On my way

Well, it's finally here, I'm actually on my way to training college now. The end of a long road of paperwork and steps is glaring me in the face. In a way I'm more excited about this then anything in my entire life. In another way I'm more nervous about this then anything in my entire life. I suppose those both make perfect sense and both are perfectly natural. This is a huge change that will encompass the rest of my life in one way or another no matter how it turns out.

For all that I've been living on my own for 10 years now I've never "left home" and now I'm doing it. I wonder if I'll break down when I realize that I will not be getting back in the van to come back to Alberta....we shall see. I am not the breaking down type of person so it's hard to say.

So here I go, continuing the journey that's brought me this far, and we'll see where the rest takes me.

Farewell Sunday

Well, I can't believe it, not only has my farewell Sunday come but now it's gone. It was both a really good day and a really sad one. I had an opportunity to speak and I talked about growing up in such a great church. Surrounded by people who love me and have always taken care of me. I have never been and never will be able to say that I have no one there for me and nowhere to go because there was always someone at Glenmore who would be there for me.

That response time was the only time I started to cry during the morning and those who know me will know that crying at all at something like this is unusual but it was a big day. After the service there was a time to chat and enjoy some great desserts and cake. I had a great time chatting with friends and family and getting an opportunity to say goodbye. There were lots of hugs, and laughs and memories. I will always miss these people but I know that they'll welcome me back for holidays, and visits no matter what happens.

I've included some pictures from the day.

My crazy family

My best friends

Cutting the cake

Response time

It may be a rut but it's all mine

Some people will tell you I'm in a rut, others will say that I am a creature of habit. Personally I say I'm just content. I am the person that tends to buy the same items at the same stores all the time. As I've been moving I started to wonder if they'd notice I was even gone.

Calgary is a bigish city and todays society is not focussed as much on customer service, so I think between those two items they probably won't notice one less customer no matter how regularly I buy items from their location.

I am excited to set up new habits, locations, items and stores in Winnipeg. It never takes me long to hunt up those haunts of mine. I remember when I was working in Australia for 3 weeks and within the first three days I had my routine firmly established. Now if that was somewhere I was living for only 3 weeks imagine if I'm there for 2 years. I might have my routine established in the first day - we'll have to see.

You may have guessed from the above that I'm not exactly thrilled about change in my life so I've been having feelings of extreme excitement warring with my inherent dislike of change. However, in my new quest to be more positive I've been focussing on the excitement and reminding myself that this gives me a great chance to make or break habits that need it.

Packing

When I was 16-18 or 19 years old I moved around on a regular basis for a variety of reasons. I lived with family, friends and strangers and finally got my own apartment and I've lived there ever since.

During all of those moves I lived out of a couple of duffle bags, and that was it so I don't think I fully appreciated what a pain it would be to do this particular move. In the time I've been here I've not looked through anything. I moved in, nested and have gotten to the point where it may take dynamite to get me to Winnipeg. What I am loving about this is was I'm downsizing but that is not enough to make this whole process completely enjoyable.

Oh well I'm too the point now where I'm almost all packed so I might as well suck it up and get over it ;).

On a sad side note my kitty is moving to BC this weekend and I will miss her very much.

Stampede 2009

Well, another year, another Stampede. The Calgary Stampede is referred to as the greatest outdoor show on earth and kicks off with a parade on Friday morning and runs for 10 days. The Salvation Army band is the longest running marching band in the parade and I've been marching with them for 12 or 13 years now and loving every minute of it. I started marching with them holding the banner, then moved up to the timbrels and now I march with the band itself. I still enjoy marching no matter how wiped I am at the end. To see the crowds of people, all the kids waving and having fun, and the fact that my weirdest friends are the ones who call my name out when I march :). I don't know where I'll be next summer but I know if I'm not marching I'll feel the loss but I'll be thinking of the group as they go down and I know I won't miss the blisters I always get.

Friday night of course it was down to the grounds to hang out, watch the chuckwagon races which are very exciting, and the grandstand show. This year as I headed down to the grounds from the train station the police were stopping everyone and there were a whole bunch of official looking black vehicles and media. I was very curious as to who was arriving and low and behold it was Canada's Prime Minister Stephen Harper...very exciting. After that we were allowed to go ahead and I met up with the band and we went into the grounds. I loved the chuckwagon races and even managed to pick the team featuring a Calgary Flame for my pick in one of the heats and the grandstand show was fabulous. Although, I didn't like one particular set of stunts where it just looked like they were going to die, and die horribly.

Saturday afternoon and evening was the carnival, BBQ and concert. There was a HUGE number of people there for the carnival and that was fantastic. I was thrilled to see such a response for a church event. The food was as always excellent, and the program was very entertaining. After the program a whole bunch of us went out for something to eat and to catch up with each other. Fred and Wendy were down from Edmonton, and it's always good to see Wendy unfortunately she brought Fred but what are you going to do? I'm kidding, of course it was great to see both of them.

Well, today ends another stampede weekend and my last as a member of the band (possibly, one never knows), but it definitely ends out my year before heading to college, and it ended on a great note.

Ruthlessly Sorted

As I am getting ready to move I am going through boxes, bags and other assorted storage items that I haven't gone through in a very long time if ever. When I first moved into my apartment my mother dropped off a large load of things that she'd kept for me and I never went into them. So now I am taking the opportunity and going through all the boxes and I find I am getting rid of as much as I can stand. I am pushing aside that thin streak of sentimentality and tossing aside what doesn't mean the most to me. Now of course I am nothing if not practical, so, I will be having a yard sale, be donating any useful items to the Salvation Army etc...

I have enjoyed seeing some of them items though. I found my grade 6 year book and it still burns me that I didn't press hard enough on the paper so you can only read about 3 words :). I also discovered the reasons behind why I am not allowed to have a library card anymore, and the remnants of my obsession with finding items that had my name on them. What I really love to find are the pictures - which are not going anywhere. Pictures of my dad with...HAIR, and I don't actually ever remember him with hair so it's a big revelation. Pictures of my various uncles weddings, and pictures of me growing up - apparently the attitude was there from day 1.

Now I will go continue to sort, and hopefully toss, but thoroughly enjoy some walks down memory lane.

Here I go

Well, I may be writing in my blog more often over the next couple of months, but it's hard to say. This month I am obviously because for some reason I find myself compelled to write in my blog and that almost never goes well :).

I am feeling a little tugged both ways right now because there's this massive to do list but I don't want to start some things now because it's too early and at the same time I feel like I'm leaving in no time at all. The best I can do is keep plugging away at the items and the fact of the matter is what is done is done, and what isn't isn't. I can't change that nor would I if I could. The deadline helps me stay focussed.

I've started to come to the realization that oh my goodness I'm leaving this city that I've lived in for my entire life. Leaving a routine that is firmly established and centred around a church that I've been attending since I was 7 years old. No matter how often I reassure myself that I'll see my friends and family for vacation and online it just won't be the same. No more phone calls from people saying they are ont their way to pick me up for a night out...no more "we're going to BP's" and knowing which one cause it's the only one we go to. So, I'm a little sad in and around the thrill of moving forward and doing what I'm meant to do.

Someone asked me once "What do you think when I say home", and I answered Calgary, and they were a bit surprised, but I know that no matter what changes happen in my life, and no matter where I end up this will always be home. Even if it isn't my first answer. I don't think you can ever forget the first place that was truly home.

Now, does the person who asked me that remember that conversation?

Busy

One of the comments I quite often get from people I socialize with that I met through work is "Wow, you're so busy". I always respond "No, not really" and in the past couple of years that statement was especially true. I was only out generally 2 sometimes 3 nights a week and of course Sundays. This was a huge slow down from someone who growing up considered less then 4 nights a week out a vacation. However, since my acceptance to training college my schedule has completely gotten away from me. Ah well, it is good to be reminded of how to live a filled life and I figure it's good preparation for what will be in my books and everyone elses a very busy lifestyle in a few months.

On the practical side of things I'm going around my apartment cleaning and sorting. I haven't started packing yet although that will come soon enough. The big thing for me is that I haven't cleaned out my stuff in over 5 years. The one thing about moving around every couple of months like I did when I was younger was that I didn't have that much stuff to worry about. Now I'm going to get much closer to that then I have been in awhile.

In other news, my birthday passed just recently and I always enjoy that. This year I headed to Edmonton and enjoyed being a little bit spoiled up there. Of course they do that every time I'm up there so I don't need a birthday but this time I got presents.

Now to reorganize my life and figure out how I'm going to fit in a trip to BC for my cat, packing, moving, moving again and getting to Winnipeg. Not to mention all the smaller yet no less vital things like the fact that I still have to do my day-to-day items like get groceries, go to work and make it to band practice.

Wish me luck, pray for me and stay away the minimum safe distance :)

Who'da Thunk?!?!

I found out very recently that I was accepted into the 2009 session for Canada's College for Officers Training. I am and will probably continue to walk around in a slight daze wondering if it's real.

I have been talking about going to training college for as long as I can possibly remember so the fact that it's finally here seems odd. I am excited and terrified about the challenge ahead of me as I move forward.

Everyone around me has been wonderfully supportive and I know they will continue to be so and I am always thankful for that. This support makes the challenges ahead seem surmountable instead of insurmountable.

Seattle

Well, I'm home from a trip across the border. This weekend I went to Seattle for 3 or 4 days to sightsee, shop and relax. I flew to Vancouver, B.C. to meet my mother and then we drove across the border which I have not done for a long time. We stopped at a mall for some shopping and headed into the city to check in and figure out our game plan for the weekend.

I got to see the fish fly at Pike Place market and a couple of those huge US stores that we don't have here. The selection at Bed, Bath and Beyond was something else. I enjoyed some fabulous and incredibly fresh seafood right on the pier and hit up my two fav. stores Victoria's Secret and Bath & Body Works. I sucked up my fear of heights and went to the top of the Space Needle which was windy enough that I was glad everything was fenced around, but the view was amazing and totally worth it.

I did manage to be sick (and still am as I write this), and of course being me I fell and scraped mself up some. I am now back home and still on holidays for another week or so and am planning on just lying low and getting completely healthy.

Tough Questions

I've been asked a lot of questions lately that have really made me focus on my faith and where I'm at with it, my life and how I got to where I am, and where I'd like to go. The ones about my life are in a lot of ways very easy. It's not a problem for me to look back and see my pitfalls, my successes and exactly how I ended up where I am in turns of money, jobs, and everything else.

The ones about my faith and where I'd like to go slow me up a little. Not that I don't know the answers but I haven't really had to explain that before and putting it into words has been something of a challenge. Those questions have been good for me though. I have been forced to evaluate myself on many levels and admittedly have not always come out showing well.

Some of the questions have been about timing too and that's not a question I feel I can answer except to say that I believe this is when God has called me to take the steps I'm taking, and ya know even if things don't happen this year that doesn't necessarily mean that I'm wrong. Maybe I do need to do the paperwork, and have the process done this year regardless of whether or not it happens right off the bat.

Well enough about that...I have a busy month in March and I am excited for it. I look forward to seeing some old friends, gaining some more experience in ministry and having some time off of work. I do love vacation even if I don't go anywhere.

Construction Zones

I seem to have a beacon on me that says please surround with construction. See not that long ago the city undertook a major construction job right at the intersection where my building resides. This caused a variety of minor but noticeable changes in my life and I was glad when the bulk of it was done. However, just as that job was wrapping up a major construction zone started up across the street from the building where I worked, and again several minor but noticeable changes. Well, I no longer work in that building so I thought that I would finally be free of all construction zones when....you guessed it. They are remodelling the entire interior of the lobby of the building where I now work. I just can't seem to get away from construction. I suppose now I will just have to be happy that these projects provide people with jobs which in these times is no small feat.

As for my job it has gotten interesting. Not only the increase and variety of my actual work but also the tense atmosphere due to potential layoffs. I am trying to take it all in stride while praying that I keep my job, and that everyone else keeps their jobs, but it can be difficult to work with that hanging over your head all the time.

I find working with the possibility of being laid off especially daunting because I am saving for training college this year. My application has progressed nicely and I am now finishing up the last of my paperwork. I passed my course with flying colours (for me), and am glad to be finishing everything up. Once that paperwork is done it will just be a matter of patience and prayer, and ya know...I can do those.

Oh, and I also got two new tattoos to my families many varied reactions, but these two should finish it up for me. I can't believe I have 4...it seems like it should be a lot but maybe because three of them are on my back I don't think it's too many.

Happy New Year

So I hope everyone had a phenomenal New Years Eve. I know I totally did. I got to go to the Flames game and watch the Oilers get beat which is always sweet. There were no fights between the teams - some in the stands - but not between the actual players which is kind of unusual for a battle of Alberta. There were a load of oilers fans around me and that made it interesting too. After the game it was off to the church for the countdown to midnight and before I knew it, it was 2:30ish and I was just heading home. I was completely wired from all the pop I'd had to drink and so didn't end up going to bed until 5am. Now I'm off to my annual crashing of the Guy's New Years Dinner - shouldn't have invited me once, now you'll never be rid of me :).

2008 was an interesting year for me. I finally progressed on my training college application, did my very first road trip with my Dad (that I remember), my mother got remarried, a lot of my friends got married, I switched jobs, I preached for the first time and I got to go to the Calgary New Years Eve hockey game. There were loads of other things too but that's just a few of the noteworthy things in my year. It's always a good feeling to look back and not regret the year before and I'm glad to know I accomplished something too.

2009 could hold and will hopefully hold some fairly massive changes in my life including moving out of the city I've always lived in and leaving a lot behind. Even as I get nervous thinking about those changes I am so happy to take comfort in the fact that my friends and family will always be there for me. I have so many "family" members who may not be related to me by blood but have supported me and cared for me as though I was and that's a constant comfort. So a big thanks and love to my entire family - related or not :).